Gotta Go Back In Time...

Title's just for you, Ben.

So, anyone ever ask you "if you could go back in time and change something about yourself or something that happened to you, would you? And what would you do?" Sure you have. I used to think I wouldn't do a damn thing. Leave well enough alone. Who knows what I'd screw up.

Lately, though, I've come to realize that I would do one thing. One thing only. And it might only effect a few things in my life, but it probably would have made things much easier for me as a teenager, especially in my latter days of high school.

I'd go back and tell my younger self what I've come to realize about my nature: I'm creative. Or, more specifically, I have a desire to be creative.

Seems kind of odd, right? Well, let me elaborate a bit. From like, third grade (maybe fourth) on, I was a musician. I started playing the trombone. Got relatively good at it. Didn't hurt that there was a significant lack of trombone players in my area so I was usually the only one, or one of two.

By the time I hit high school, though, other creative bugs hit me. I didn't really start exploring them until later, specifically my senior year. But they caused all kinds of headaches. But I wanted to try acting out...which caused friction with my music teacher.

Now, I can look back and see that he saw massive potential in me musically that was being wasted because I split my time. But back then, I was a head strong kid who wanted to do what he wanted to do.

So, I'd go back and tell that kid, "there's nothing wrong with being creative in multiple media...but you should express that to others." Like my music teacher. Maybe come to a better understanding with him...maybe find a way to do both in equal time. At least help him realize that I wasn't trying to be an unmotivated piece of crap, I simply couldn't be held to one medium of creativity. I could have avoided what turned in to a real emotional tug of war that year.

So, whenever Doc Brown finishes up that Delorean, I'll know what I'll be doing.