Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Tonight, we have a very special
interview. This time with Annie the Cat. Once again, I'll shall be providing translation for you all who don't speak Feliniean.Bart: Thanks for being here, Annie.
Annie: Make this quick. I have napping to do.
Bart: I've been known to refer to you and Elmo as Garfield and Odie. What do you think about that?
Annie: That's ludicrous. I'm not orange. I do not eat lasagna. I actually kind of like Mondays. Elmo, on the other hand, makes an excellent Odie.
Bart: Why do you swipe at him all the time?
Annie: I can't yell at him, like you do. Not that he listens to you. Or remembers I have claws.
Bart: Why do you like to lay on our magazines and books so much, when we lay them down on the couch, or bed?
Annie: Your books and magazines?
Bart: Yeah, we bought them.
Annie: Of course you bought them. For me.
Bart: I don't really think...
Annie: Of course you don't. Silly man. Everything you do is for my benefit. *sniff*
Bart: Interesting concept. Next time you get antsy for food, maybe I won't fill your bowl up to your liking. How's that sound?
Annie: That's dirty pool. It's bad enough you let that slobbering thing eat my food...
Bart: Simply trying to point out an obvious fact of life.
Annie: You bore me. Excuse me, I see a fleck of light on the ground.
This is where the interview sadly ended, as Annie found the fleck of light highly addictive.
Yes! cat interview. Drive her crazy with a penlight in a dark room. My cat flipped through the air trying to catch the light.
ReplyDeleteHahahahaha! I LOVED this. Garfield is one of my favourite characters, and the film amused me no end. I have never had a cat, though, but I am feline enough to be one!! Catty, to be sure! :-)
ReplyDeletecheers,
Cecilia
Holy shit, that cat's bigger than the pooch - who's been eating who's food here? One roll on him, and he'll smother..
ReplyDeleteThe cat had to eat or have all the food be gone early in her life, and now she definitely is a big cat for life. You can't give her a diet, because she will get really upset if the food bowl has little food in it, she thinks she's going to go hungry.
ReplyDeleteMy cats taught me years ago that they are direct descendants of the Egyptian cats who were worshipped as Gods. They have never forgotten this.
ReplyDeleteI once threatened to cut back on their food supply. The boss cat reminded that I sleep on my back and that action exposes my throat. All through the night. My experiment was a failure.