So, I got my mom sheets for Christmas. I'd worry about announcing this on my blog when we're a week out from Christmas still, but she doesn't have computer access. Plus, she's fairly computer illiterate, and probably thinks a blog is a naughty euphemism for poo. And plus, her MS has given her the memory of goldfish. She probably already forgot that I even gave them to her already, so I can maybe give her two gifts for the price of one this season. I'm an awful, yet awesome, person, I know. I got her jersey knit sheets. Why? Why not? Jersey knit sheets are effin' awesome. I can't believe you people don't use them. I can't believe that jersey knit isn't the standard, instead of those...uh...other kind. I can't even feel those things anymore without feeling like I scratched my skin all up from the coarseness of the devil fabric.
Anyway, I also got them for her because I wash her sheets for her (most of the time) and one of her sets is pretty much obliterated. I figured she might want a much softer set, because she's crippled and all. Oh, sorry. Handicapped. Oh, sorry, handicapable. Jesus, that's a nuisance. When did we start giving a shelf life to positivity? Give it a few years, and the term will be something ridiculous like handicripple. Simply because handicapable will have earned this perceived negative stigma. Getting the train back on the track here...anyway, she can't move her legs and tends to get like, you know, bed sores. So while I seriously doubt the power of the jersey knit will stop her from getting sores, I figure it might make her at least a little more comfortable. Am I an awesome son or what?
Anyway, jersey knit rules, and you drool.
Next time...my out of nowhere hatred for Rachael Ray.
You are awesome arent you.
ReplyDeleteIf you're going to talk about Rachel Ray, make sure you mention that her one redeeming quality is that she's not too thin (and this makes your wonderful wife happy because there are too many skinny girls on TV.)
ReplyDeleteSounds like a thoughtful gift for yer moms.
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