So, even though retail establishments now start gearing up for Christmas pretty much on December 26th, there's a period when you reaaaaaaally know it's that glorious holiday shopping season. The week of Thanksgiving. Why? That's when three sets of commercials start becoming unavoidable:
1) Jewelry
2) Toy
3) Fragrances
Now, I have nothing against toy ads, though since I watch a little bit of children's programming I tend to get deluged with them. I do have a really big problem with jewelry ads at any time of year. I'm sorry, but diamonds do not equal love. Stop selling them like that. Plus, this year, there's been this onslaught of patronizing jewelry commercials where somehow the man is seen as either ignorant of jewelry stores altogether ("wait, how did he know about Shaws?") or just flat out superior ("He went to Jared.").
But it's the fragrance ads that really crack me up. Has there ever, and Bart means eeeeeeever, been a more pretentious advertisement than one for a perfume or cologne? The presentation, the voice overs, the production values that are better than some shows on television. All for smell juice. Are you kidding? And this has been SOP since at least the 80s. It's like they figure if the scent is going to have a really ridiculously pretentious name, they might as well go whole hog.
I said this to The Queen the other night, and I meant it. A company should have a fragrance ad where a guy or gal is standing in a very plain background (like the I'm a PC, I'm a Mac commercials, which by the way, even though I'm not a Mac head, I find funny, if pretentious), and they say "Choices. Cologne or perfume. It smells nice." Commercial over. I'd buy that shit on principle alone. And think of how much money they'd save. They could probably afford to
sell the scent for way less, and make it up on volume from the millions of people refreshed by the honesty and simplicity of the ad campaign.By the way, if there isn't a cologne or perfume named "Choices" and it comes out in the near future, I will be demanding restitution.
Diamonds don't buy love? That's where I've been going wrong all these years.
ReplyDeleteNext time round it's something practical, like pork chops or pyjamas.
Happy Christmas, btw!
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas. May you and yours have a joyful holiday.
ReplyDeleteWith best wishes from
Mr & Mrs YesBut